Would you think a wedding announcement was begging for gifts?

Question

Okay I asked a question earlier about wording a wedding announcement. Now I am wondering, if I send everyone a wedding announcement (after the wedding, with a pic of us inside of it) does it look like I'm gift grabbing? We are only have 9 people at the wedding so I want to send family and close friends announcements but I don't want it to look like I'm saying "hey we're married, send us a gift".

If you received an announcement would you think it was a gift grab?

Answer 1

An announcement is meant to let people know that the event being announced -- the wedding in this case -- happened. That is all. Knowing that, I would never assume that the announcement were meant to solicit gifts.



Mind you, I also know that no gift is ever required, so I don't see a wedding invitation as a gift solicitation, either. I don't even see a wedding registry as being related to gift solicitation, since no decent bride is "expecting" gifts anyhow.



Announcements do serve a practical purpose: they let your social contacts know that since you are now part of a married couple, any of *their* future social correspondence need to be sent to the two of you. Many new couples get incensed when Christmas cards or invitations get sent to just the wife or just the husband. But, if their friends and family never got an announcement, how can they be expected to know to update their address book?



I suspect the people who think announcements are a gift-grab, have simply never thought of what their actual purpose is.

Answer 2

If you are keeping the event quiet until after, then a wedding announcement is very appropiate. It is better than your family or friends finding out that you're married via facebook or word of mouth. It seems like theses days, etiquette dictates that nothing can be done without seeming selfish or rude. If you breathe, then you're hogging air. Send the announcements out, and if you get gifts then great. Just know for yourself that you are doing it to share your happy news, not in the hopes that you will be recieving gifts. It is not a gift grab, it is an announcement.

Answer 3

First, I want you to know that you are not the only one in this position. We couldn't afford to have the big wedding and I've had some health issues, so we are getting married tomorrow with only 14 people attending (immediate family only, no friends or extended family). One side of the family is aware of the event ahead of time (my parents told their sisters/brothers), but his family does not know, and will find out next week after the wedding. (also trying to prevent crashers) Even our best friends do not know that we are getting married tomorrow.



My plan is to also send an announcement with a picture of the two of us. I do not expect gifts, and hope that people do not see it as an attempt to gift grab. I see it as a courtesy to those that mean so much to me. I think it is the appropriate thing to do. I've had requests for announcements an pictures.

Answer 4

This really isn't a done thing in Australia- usually an announcement is posted in the local newspaper, and not sent to individual people unless its a invitation to the wedding.



If I were to recieve a personal announcement I would not send a gift as i believe only invited guests are obligated to buy gifts.

Answer 5

I had a small wedding of less than 20 people so sent out announcements to all of the people I would have liked to invite. Most of them responded with a call or a card and many sent gifts. The overall response was positive with people saying thank you for the announcement and understood when I explained why they had not been invited. I did not get any negative responses.

Answer 6

I honestly believe that people will only send a gift if they honestly believe they should. I don't think that you sending a wedding announcement is asking for a gift. I personally would offended by not being informed of your wedding. Hearing it through the grape vine tends to hurt some people. Also, being officially informed and included your thoughts would not at all make me think that you were begging for a gift!



Congrats and YAY FOR YOU! : ) Hope you two have a long and happy life together!

Answer 7

No, a wedding announcement is not a gift grab. In fact, you won't receive gifts from most people. However, it does give you an opportunity to notify people who weren't or couldn't be invited to the wedding. For instance, I sent wedding announcements to cousins I haven't seen in years. However, I talked to their mother every other month (she passed away in September). I would not have invited them to the wedding - my mom and uncle are still very angry that my cousins didn't notify them of their great-aunt's death. They found out from another cousin 2 months later. The letters I got from them after that did a lot to allay the situation.

Answer 8

no. it's a nice gesture in my opinion. a way of saying "You mean enough to me that I wanted to tell you." If someone wants to send gifts and they are capable of sending gifts, they will. I don't believe that anyone would feel obligated to buy gifts or that your true friends or family would think that is the only reason they got the announcement. I wouldn't.

Answer 9

I wouldn't assume you were asking for gifts but I can see how some might think you were. There is nothing there that even remotely implies you are wanting gifts of any kind. All you are doing is announcing that you got married. End of story.

Answer 10

I think it would look like you were fishing for gifts if you listed that you were registered or some thing like that. If it is just an announcement with a photo inside then you shouldn't offend anyone.

Answer 11

Personally, I wouldn't see that as a gift grab unless it said somewhere you were registered on it. I would just see it as an announcement.

Answer 12

I don't think it is begging for gifts at all. Relatives and friends would love to be updated with this very important and big event in your life. It's a thoughtful gesture.