Which do you prefer... unity candles or unity sand?

Question

I think the sand is really pretty...... but I've never seen it done at a wedding. What do you think?

Answer 1

We are planning to do the unity sand idea. Our ceremony will be held outdoors, so the candles could blow out too easily. I also think the sand is so pretty, and our colors will be blue and lavender, and I think we need a third one, so probably white. I've never been to a wedding that had sand either, so I think it will make our ceremony a little more unique.

Answer 2

Personally, I don't like either one because I think every time I have seen it done, the people have picked a really, really long song to play while they are doing it. They get done way ahead of the song, and then they just stand there and uncomfortably look at each other. However, if I had to choose, I would go with sand. I don't know how many weddings I have been to where the candle went out, wouldn't light, whatever. So sand is my vote.

Answer 3

I like the Unity Candle idea and thought about doing it until I found another ceremony. I think Unity ceremony will look pretty if done well, and that the sand is more appropriate for the beach/lake wedding.

Answer 4

I've seen unity sand done several times and I just have some practical advice for you. Basically, make sure to do a full practice run with your vases and your sand way before the ceremony. I've never seen it done smoothly.



One time the sand was too clumpy and didn't want to pour smoothly. Another time the individual vase's weren't the right size for the bride and groom to both pour into the main vase at the same time.



Personally, I choose not to do candles or sand but all that matters is if you like it.



In its place, we had the guests sing our favorite hymn while we took our first communion as a married couple. That had more meaning to us than sand or candles. But its what has meaning and beauty for you that is important.

Answer 5

I don't really care for either of them but I prefer the sand because it has actual history as a Cherokee wedding ritual whereas the candle originated in the 80s on a soap opera and Hallmark ran off with the idea.



The wedding itself with the vows and all is about unity in itself. You don't need to add the mini-ceremonies to it.

Answer 6

I thought people only did the whole unity candle thing when they wanted to appease some family member who hadn't made the cut to get into the actual bridal party....something along the lines of,



'Oh, my cousin Sue is going to be hurt because I didn't make her a bridesmaid-let's have her light this stupid candle so she feels included.'



They've turned this nonsense into sand now? You have unity 'options'? Ugh. Please, don't do this to your guests, it's soo boring. But if you must, then go with the sand..



Honestly though, it's not a 'tradition'-no one did this until the late 80's, just as a previous poster mentioned. They just started selling the dang candles as a marketing ploy.How much are they gonna charge for sand?

Answer 7

Personally I love candles but for my home and the unity candle isn't something me or my fiance want to do. The unity sand is great and also very different from what everyone else does and I like to be unique and not be like everyone else. I like the thought of picking out my own color of sand, the vases to put them in and then creating what we believe to be the start of our new life. To me different is better.

Answer 8

Unity Sand! That is what my fiance and I are doing! I think that they are more unique because you don't see people do it that often, plus you can pick your own colors, such as using your wedding colors. Plus, if it is something you want to keep in your home for a long time, the sand lasts longer. Also, you can order the unity sand and vases and have your names and wedding date engraved on them!

Answer 9

Sand. My daughter did it at her outdoor wedding. The minister was involved, said a few words and then poured ivory sand in the container first as a symbol of a firm foundation.

They daughter and son-in-law poured their sand in. Came out beautiful

The entire thing took maybe 2-3 minutes so it wasn't like it drug the ceremony on and on.



Plus, the sand in the container is a lovely keepsake of their wedding.

Answer 10

I like the candle idea, but I also make candles so I guess my answer is a bit biast.....lol

I have never seen the sand done either, but it is definitely a cute idea.

If you want to be a little different and unique, go with the sand.

Answer 11

Sorry, but neither. They are both way too overdone in my opinion. Now if someone had a completely original idea to symbolize unity, that would be really neat.



(If I had to choose, I would do the sand, because it can be kind of a keepsake from your wedding day.)

Answer 12

I plan to do the sand at my wedding because you get to keep it where as a candle you would have to blow out.

Answer 13

I don't like either one, kinda boring in my opinion. But if you have to do one of them, I like the candles better. Candles are just prettier to look at. My friend did the sand at her wedding and I didn't like it all that much.

Answer 14

Neither- I think they're both sort of silly, and they make the ceremony drag on for far longer than necessary. From the standpoint of a guest at the ceremony, I'd prefer if the ceremony were kept short and sweet, with meaningful things like readings and maybe a song, but something mroe interesting than watching two people light candles or pour sand.

Answer 15

Sand outdoors, candles indoors for sure

Answer 16

We are doing sand as we want to include our kids (fire bad). Also it seems like all of our friends had trouble getting the center candle to light at the ceremony.

Answer 17

I think sand is great if it is an outdoor wedding or even better a beach wedding.

Answer 18

Candles.

I am having a church wedding and I think the setting of a church is more appropriate for candles then sand.

Answer 19

I think the sand is prettier! Here's something else you can consider doing!..........................





I copied this from another answer here on Y!A.................



Box, Wine & Love Letter Ceremony"



While there are so many traditions that a couple can incorporate into their

wedding vows, such as the Unity Candle, The Rose Exchange, and many more, there is one special idea that I have recently learned about from my dear friend, Richard (Thanks Rich!) who attended a wedding in Holland. While he was not sure if it was a Dutch tradition, he found it to be extremely touching. When he returned to the states, he could not wait to share this with me. Basically the JP or officiant asks the couple getting married to find a strong wooden box that will hold two bottles of wine and two wine glasses. The couple is then asked to each write a letter to one another, expressing their thoughts about the good qualities that they found in their future partner and their reasons for falling in love with each other. Under no condition can they read each other’s letter. They are to seal them and put them in the box with the wine and glasses. Upon finalizing the wedding ceremony, the officiant will announce to the guests that he / she had asked the couple to write letters to each other and put them in the box with the wine and glasses. The officiant will explain that should the couple ever find their marriage in serious trouble, before making any irrational

decisions, they must open the box, drink wine together, and read the letter that they wrote to one another to reflect on why they fell in love with each other in the first place. The hope is that there will never be a reason to have to open the box, unless of course, it is for a 25 year anniversary! At the wedding in Holland, members of the wedding party were handed nails to hammer (which I dress up with a white ribbon and bow) the box shut. However, as an alternative, I suggest that it be the couple to each take a nail and hammer the box shut (with two pre-drilled holes to make it easier to hammer), if only to add that special touchinto their wedding vows. This is only a suggestion, but I just think that it makes the ceremony extra special for the couple.



Truthfully, I find this to be the most romantic (and coolest!) addition to

incorporate into a marriage ceremony. Not that my husband and I needed to do this (well o.k., maybe sometimes!), but I wish that we had. It would have been fun opening it up on our 25th Anniversary!



The Officiant would say the following:



"Alexis & Travis, I have asked you as a couple, to find a strong wooden box that will hold two bottles of wine, and two wine glasses. In addition, I have asked each of you to write a letter to one another, expressing your thoughts about the good qualities that you have found in your future partner, as well as, your reasons for falling in love with each other. I requested that under no condition were you to read each other’s letter, and that you were to seal them in individual envelopes and put them in the box with the wine and glasses."



"Alexis & Travis, should you ever find your marriage enduring serious

difficulties, I am asking that before you make any irrational decisions, that you both, as a couple, open the box, drink some wine together, and then venture off into separates rooms to read the letters that you wrote to one another when you were united as a couple. By reading these love letters, you will reflect upon the reasons that you fell in love with each other in the first place. The hope here is, that there will never be a reason for you to open this box, unless of course, it is for your 25 year anniversary!"

"Alexis & Travis, I now ask that each of you take a nail, one at a time, and hammer the box shut."





...................

I hope you like this idea! and God Bless your marriage!!

Answer 20

I've seen them both done and they're both stupid. hello, the whole theme of a wedding is unity. why do people feel the need to waste time reinforcing it? totally sappy.

Answer 21

candles indoors and sand outdoors.

Answer 22

sophisticated stuff. browse onto google and yahoo. it can assist!