Are you having a head table or sweetheart table?

Question

We are planning on a sweetheart table but more and more our family thinks that is soo wierd and say they've never heard of someone NOT having a head table. Our thinking is that almost everyone in our whole bridal party is either married, has a baby, or both. Aside from 2 groomsmen whome are single everyone has a husband/wife. And two bridemaids will have very young infants with them (they are breastfeeding and can't be away from the babies for that long). We didn't want to break all the cuples up or stick one parent or the other with the babies, and I know the married people would like to be with their spouse at a table. But obviuosly we arent having the spouses at the head table because they arent in the wedding, and the table would be much too big. The only problem this is causing is that by not having them at a head table we then have to add an additional table into the room to seat them as opposed to the long table against the wall with us. WHich are you having?

Answer 1

We had a table for just the two of us, and it was lovely. Our bridal party was very small so there was no need for a headtable, which I have never liked. The idea of a small, intimate table just for myself and my husband was what we both wanted.

Answer 2

We aren't having bridesmaids and groomsmen at our ceremony, as we're keeping everything rather simple. We've decided that we are going to have our parents sit with us at the reception. I thought this was a nice touch, since I know that they are looking forward to our wedding as much as we are!



I like your idea of a sweetheart table. It's nice to not seat couples apart, especially ones with kids. However, most people understand the tradition of the head table, so it's not an uncommon request. If you decide to go with the head table, seat the moms toward the end of the table so that they can easily escape to care for their babies. You could also arrange the other tables so that their husbands will be closer to their side of the head table.



Don't feel that you have to explain yourself to your family. If you choose a sweetheart table, then that's that. There are many other things to focus on besides who will be seated next to you and your husband.

Answer 3

I am having a head table, but a sweetheart table I thought was becoming more and more popular... Are these relatives a little older and that's why they don't know about this? Either way it's your wedding and if having a sweetheart table is good for you guys then just have it and forget what everyone else says. Besides one main plus about a sweetheart table is you can have a little more privacy than a head table... Not much more, but a little.

Answer 4

We had a sweet heart table and it was great. You are not isolated as some will probably tell you. It's not like your table is in another room or something..



Your going to be up and about dancing and chatting with your guests. So you're really only going to be at the table during dinner. I loved having that time with my new husband. : )



Plus, it's easier on the bridal party if you have a sweetheart table. In your case, let them sit with their spouses and children. They will appreciate it.

Answer 5

We had a sweetheart table that was in the middle of two tables- one for the groomsmen and their wives, and one for the bridesmaids their husbands. It was more comfortable for everyone- no one was split up, and we didn't have to choose between either group.



The thing I hate about a head table is that no one ever sits at it. Everyone gets up to go "visit" their date or their spouse, and then you have this long table at the front of the room that hardly has anyone sitting at it.



Do what makes you happy- as long as you're not inconveniencing anyone (and you're not) then you should do what you want, don't worry what everyone "thinks"

Answer 6

Sweetheart for us! We also thought our bridal party should be allowed to sit with their family/significant others and the sweetheart table gives the bride and groom some time to actually sit down and eat without anyone else disturbing them (our maitre'd said she would run interference for us haha!) My brother had a sweetheart table and LOVED it because it worked out best for them too. Sometimes the head tables works best if people don't mind being made to sit apart from friends/family/significant others. It depends on the situation.



Good luck!

Answer 7

My boyfriend's sister got married this summer and her "head table" was just her and the groom (and 90% of the time during dinner they were walking around anyways). The other members of the wedding party sat with their family or friends (i.e. my boyfriend sat w/ me & his parents, the brother & sister of the groom sat w/ their dates and the groom's parents, her 2 friends sat at a table w/ their dates and other friends)



No one seemed to think this was wierd or that there was anything wrong with it. Everyone in the wedding party was happy because they got to be with their dates/families etc and the bride & groom were never at the table anyways.



It is your wedding! You and the groom make the rules, forget all the silly tradition. You do what works for your wedding party. Why not just ask them what they would prefer?

Answer 8

We are having a head table because we think that sweetheart table is kinda secluded and we want everyone to feel involved in our day. We figure that they would just have to be there long enough for toasts and we are have a light finger food/open bar reception so if they want to get up after that and walk around talk..whatever that would be okay...because we will not be setting there the whole time either..but honestly its your day and you should do what you want, you should ask your wedding party what they want. Congrats on the wedding!

Answer 9

We had a head table at our reception. It's good because it gives a good center of focus when things are going on. Spouses don't typically sit at the table and neither do kids. But the reality is, you are only there long enough to eat :)

Answer 10

I'm having a sweetheart table at my wedding. Our reception venue has a max of 100 people, we have 12 people in wedding party and I would not want to split them from their significant others, so it's ridiculous to have a 26-person (24 + us) head table because that's more than 25% of total guests at wedding!

Answer 11

My husband and I had a sweetheart table for the exact same reasons you mentioned. On the grooms side of the room sat the groomsmen with their spouses/significant others/dates/families and on the the brides side sat the bridesmaids with their spouses/significant others/dates/families and it all worked out wonderfully! Our bridal party appreciated that we considered what it would be like for them plus we were always wondering around our reception so we only sat down to eat!

Answer 12

We did the head table, but the wedding party decided to it with their spouses or dates. It didn't look right with my husband and i eating alone at a table for 11.

Answer 13

choose for a sweetheart table. it somewhat is going to be the only time of the day you are able to speak slightly! additionally, once you're finished eating, you are able to stroll around and chat with human beings if ought to. i found it very relaxing to be sitting with my hubby on my own! i replaced into in a marriage final week, and that that they had a head table with the six human beings interior the marriage occasion. i did not get to sit down down with my hubby (which I on no account like), and had awkward communique with the different bridesmaids. We have been additionally dealing with out to the the remainder of the team, and it basically wasn't as heat as sweetheart type!

Answer 14

We are having one large square head table, with 4 on each side. Fiance and me, mom and dad; maid of honor - she's my sister, so I'm allowing her hubby; a bridesmaid and groomsman who are married to each other; my brother who is a groomsman and his wife; best man and if he has a date and other bridesmaid who will probably have a date. I don't want the spouses to sit away, but I want us all to sit together. If one doesn't bring a date, we'll invite his grandma to sit with us. At the last wedding I was in, we sat at a long table and that was awkward becasue it limited conversation and everyone was just looking at us, but we don't want to isolate oursleves with a sweetheart table, we want to be with those closest to us.

Answer 15

Not really. All the weddings I've gone to, the couple ends up all over the place any way. We're just having a cake table and then tables for everyone to eat at while we carouse around.

Answer 16

I wanted to do a sweetheart table too, but my man was VERY traditional about the whole wedding thing (and I wanted to do the exact opposite of every tradition). I didn't even bring it up. Just figured that it would be another argument. GL

Answer 17

why dont you just do a small round table that the groom and bride would sit at then do round tables around it with the bridal party and family and let the rest of the tables be rectangle ones. do something different.

Answer 18

Head table, it's the only way to go. It's just for this one special day!

We had 18 at ours; reception was for 200 in a hotel ballroom.

Answer 19

We are going to do a sweetheart table. We chose this because we are in the same situation as you. It's just not practical to separate our best man from his wife, etc.

Answer 20

Head table. You have the rest of your lives to eat with just the two of you, ha ha :)



Good luck on the wedding :) !!!

Answer 21

in your case i think a sweetheart table is a wonderful idea.

and your wedding party can sit at a table together or split like bridesmaids and groomsmen and do 2 tables for them and your table in between them.

Answer 22

Neither. I hate head tables that separate people from their dates. We seated some of our bridal party with us and their dates, and others with their dates and friends, and other single members with friends/family.

Answer 23

It's your wedding!!!! You can do whatever you want! If you want a sweetheart table, do it! Who cares if your family thinks it's weird?? Do what makes you happy!

Answer 24

Do the sweetheart table. It is YOU & YOUR NEW SPOUCES day!! Not anyone elses!!!!

Answer 25

HEAD