How many gifts should I buy for a wedding shower?

Question

A friend of mine has not only asked me to be part of her wedding party, but to be her maid of honor. Honestly I was surprised as we arent that close. Had I known how expensive she were going to make things, I may of declined. First she picked $550 dresses, then she decided to have her bach party out of state, in a pricey condo....for three days! We also have to buy $100 shoes and pay $150 for makeup and airbrush, its just alot to ask of people. She registered at Macys and she has very expensive taste! After all the money ive shelled out, will it look tacky if I got her just two gifts off her list?

Answer 1

My goodness, the Princess Bride has been watching way too many bridal programs on TV! She really is not entitled to make her wedding party miserable and broke.



Is Donald Trump her Dad? No? Wait until she starts opening up presents after the wedding, and starts seeing $50 in an envelope, and tea towels in boxes instead of the items off her registry list!



I'll tell you my sob story. A co-worker was getting married, I went to the store, got her registry list, and found flatware that she wanted. So I bought her 4 of the 12 sets that she had listed. I paid 1/2 price for it, and she did not know that. It cost me $80, more than I had planned to spend for a wedding where I was not going to be able to be there, and a woman I barely knew.

She caught me in a public place at work, and chastised me for only buying 4. If I had paid full price, and bought twelve that she demanded of me, it would have been $480!



So, dear, stay within your budget on presents. Buy one for her shower, and one for her wedding. You can buy something nice for a small price. I bought my little freezer ice cream machine for $10. What a cute shower present, and write out some recipes on note cards for ice cream or syrup. Even include a jar of sprinkles. My machine makes great ice cream!



Watch sales, and shop at discount stores like Tuesday Morning.

Think about kits, they are very popular, pick an appliance or a pan or a pot, and include what you need to cook with it. Like a pasta boiler, put in some cute pasta, a bottle of oregano or garlic powder, some tongs, and it will still be less than $25.



If you have good penmanship, or a way to do this on computer, hit your family up for tried and true no fail recipes, and write them on cute note cards. And give credit on the card to the cook, like "Aunt Sadie's Sunday Roast." And give her a cookbook, check the book websites for bargains, I got most of my cookbooks at bookstore sales.



You do not have to attend an out of town event. But don't get caught telling a lie about why! "I do not wish to take off of work" or I just can not afford it" are fine, and require no explanation.

If the bride goes psycho Bridezilla on you, remind her that you were a last minute addition to the wedding party, and a polite bride would have said up front what the cost[s] would be.

Answer 2

WTF?



A. She doesn't have any say in her bachelorette party. If someone wants to throw her one, good for her. If you want to throw her one, good for you both! But she absolutely cannot "demand" where and how it's gonna be.



B. One gift is more than enough. You don't have to get her anything, but where I'm from, it's very unusual for people to give more than one shower gift unless they get several of the cheaper items off the registry.



C. Why on earth haven't you said something to her before now? If you can't afford a $500+ dress (that is just ridiculous), then you can't. Tell her you can't. She should have asked a price range her girls could afford before picking a dress. If you can't afford it, she can either change the dress or help you pay for it. I have never in my life heard of a bride requiring bridesmaids to spend that much on their own. That's just selfish and mean.



You have to talk to her, with some of the other girls if you can. This is totally out of control.

Answer 3

Absolutely not. One is plenty. That said, you need to reign in the princess now. You don't have to do any of those things. Tell her what you can afford, and she will have to work within that budget for a dress. If she wants specific shoes and makeup, it's up to her to pay. Also, it's up to her friends to decide what to do for a bachelorette party (if they decide to throw one). They can ask the bride for suggestions, but she doesn't give any more input or the final say. The dress price and bachelorette weekend are just obnoxious and selfish.

Answer 4

All depends on you. It is not at all necessary that you have to buy two gifts or more. Just take the gift which you want to buy from her gift list and the thing that suits your budget. You can go for cash gifts as well. Sometimes brides Register for Cash gifts also , so you can choose the money from a gift list according to your budget.

Answer 5

I don't think the number of gifts is an issue at all. You should just decide how much $$ you can afford at this point and spend that - if that works out to one gift or four, it's all about the total cost. If there is nothing on her registry that fits your budget, just give them the cash and call it good.

Answer 6

Wedding gifts are not required. They are always optional. Considering what you have agreed to pay to be part of her wedding you should not feel badly for not also opting to give any wedding gift. Your support of her wedding ceremony has cost you a great deal of money as well as your emotional commitment. Let that be your gift. Any bride who feels she was "stiffed" on gifts is an individual that does not recognized how blessed she was to have attendants that complied with her wishes.

Answer 7

It wouldn't be tacky if you got one! Or if you got her decent, neutral colored (or in a color to go with their other, $500 towels, LOL) towels from Dillards or Target. She may have asked you to be MOH because she thought you could afford her taste.



For future reference, she does not plan nor demand for her bachelorette. If the bridal party or other friends throw one for her, great. If not, that's the way the diamond-encrusted cookie crumbles.

Answer 8

Do not attend the three day party unless you really want to.

Tell her No thanks to the professional make up.

Get her one gift.It does not have to be from her registry.

Find a colorful tray.

Frame her invitation.Get some thing within your means.

Enjoy the wedding.

Answer 9

It is tacky for the bride to have her friends and family buy their own attire to be in her wedding! A bride & groom should pay for all attendents wedding clothes!

Answer 10

I would just get her one. Do brides not understand that people have budgets!?!