Well, first off you do not have to have a wedding party. It's all up to you. I was considering not having a wedding party but decided too many people would be disappointed.
On with the traditional yet unique ideas for a wedding. Mine fits under that category, so I figure I'll tell you about that first, since they are my favorite ideas. =] Our guest list is less than 50 people, probably more around the high 30s. We are getting married in front of a waterfall in the woods. Our food will basically be a glorified picnic. Sandwiches, but with nice deli meats and bread and such to make it a bit more dignified. I will wear this dress http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f14/fadedrainbows828/Some%20Random%20Shit/img0.jpg and the groom will be wearing a white suit with black details. The bridesmaids and groomsmen will all be in black [short dresses, suits - not tuxes] with blue and green details [my colors are blue and green, fits in with the nature around us while still standing out]. We will have a short ceremony and I'm thinking of using these vows:
From this day on, I choose you, my beloved (Name), to be my (husband/wife). To live with you and laugh with you; to stand by your side, and sleep in your arms; to be joy to your heart, and food for your soul; to bring out the best in you always, and, for you, to be the most that I can. I promise to laugh with you in good times, to struggle with you in bad; to solace you when you are downhearted; to wipe your tears with my hands; to comfort you with my body; to mirror you with my soul; to share with you all my riches and honors; to play with you as much as I can until we grow old; and, still loving each other sweetly and gladly, our lives shall come to an end.”
We will then move right into the food, then the cake. We haven't decided on the cake itself, but the topper is the bride and groom standing back to back with guns raised, like a spy thing. We loved this since we will be Mr and Mrs Smith officially. We will have dancing, but it will not be the focus like it is in some weddings. We will also have a croquet course set up for alternative entertainment. Our centerpieces I think will be goldfish in different vases and jars [they will only be there a short while then after the wedding whoever wants one can take one, the rest come home with us to be cared for].
So those are the ideas I'm using for my wedding. To make it truly yours, you should incorporate things that interest you in the wedding. You can stray from the traditional path, but make sure you're not incorporating anything just because it's a fad. You want to be able to look at your wedding album and not cringe. =]. I would think you'd be able to wear whatever you want at your wedding, it irritates me to think that you would be forced to wear your uniform. But you can easily theme your wedding around the army since that's obviously a passion of yours. It means you already have a color scheme, and I'm sure you can find something army themed to give as favors.
Hope you have fun planning and congrats on the finding the man of your dreams! ♥