What do you think of doing this as wedding favors?

Question

Were getting married soon and every wedding favor I've ever gotten has either been candy which we ate or something else that I've eventually thrown out. Were thinking of making a charitable donation to St. Judes Childrens Hospital and getting book marks that say "With much thought and consideration, we chose a special way to say "thank you" for sharing our day, as we celebrate the beginning of our new life together. In lieu of a traditional wedding favor, we have made a donation in honor of you to St. Jude Children's Research Hospital". It goes on but you get the idea..What do you think of this idea.Thanks!

Answer 1

My father died of Cancer in September 2009 and my brother's wedding was only 2 weeks after he passed. Him and his wife did the same thing you are thinking about doing, but they did it for the Cancer Institute here in Buffalo, NY that my father was being treated at.



I think, in my opinion, your Favor idea is WONDERFUL.



I wish I would have done something like this when I got married in 2008.

Answer 2

I totally agree with Fizzy Stuff and lalala.



I live in a small town. No one here ever does favors. I don't think people would know what they are for! I have gone to a few weddings where there were chocolates in a pouch (as a favor), which everyone just ate right at the table.



In any case, I don't think the guests care one way or another about some trinket/candle/candy.



I agree that St. Jude's is a GREAT cause, but I would simply make your donation as a lump sum and don't mention it at all. No need for the bookmarks explaining it.



I DO, however, think that it's a great idea....but do it privately.

Answer 3

that is exactly what I did except we went through Boston Children's Hospital (we both have history there). I put a verse on the back of the place cards that said "In lieu of favors we have donated $500 in name of our guests to Boston Children's Hospital, we wish you health and fortune in the future"



We got huge kudos from almost everyone at the wedding. No one really needs another matchbook or random shot glass but charity makes everyone feel good.

Answer 4

A better suggestion is giving each person a small card that says, "A donation of $X will be made in to the charity of your choice below." or something like that and list 3 or 4 for people to choose from. This way they know how much is being given and they can choose it themselves. When people do it your way I always wonder if 1. Did they really do it and 2. How much did they give. I wonder if people gave like $20 in total which really doesn't equate to what they would have spent for favors for everyone.

Answer 5

I installed a tremendous desire desk in order that visitors would choose up their desire on their manner out (ours have been too large for the location-settings, and it appeared fairly cool to have a lot of these properly stacked and paper-and-ribbon-wrapped presents set op on a properly made linen desk - I've in no way noticeable any person do that earlier than, honestly). The specific favors are pleasant tart burners with a yankee candle marriage ceremony day tart in them. It's whatever that humans fairly favored.

Answer 6

As a diabetic I don't like getting food favors and in general I don't think favors are necessary. However, if you feel the need to for favors then this is a great way to do so. Most people eventually toss out favors that aren't edible and that seems such a wast

Answer 7

I don't feel it is pushing your beliefs on to someone. Esp like in your case both families have sadly experienced cancer. I have thought of always doing the donation. I lost my mother to breast cancer so I know everyone on my side STRONGLY supports the cause. And my FI aunt alway had BC and they would strongly support it because of my mom.. So I would defienly do that if thats what you want

Answer 8

I think that it's a much better idea than any ridiculous favor I've ever gotten. Such a good idea that I will consider doing the same thing, only my money goes to the SPCA...

Answer 9

I think it is a lovely idea. Who says you have to give your guests gifts in the first place. I mean, it's traditional but not required. I think it is thoughtful!

Answer 10

I work very closely with an NGO, and know how much donations by the general public are needed and appreciated. However, I suggest you simply make the donation without mentioning it to your guests.



First, I believe it is fundamentally wrong to push a cause on another person. And that is essentially what you are doing with the "in honor of". Someone will think "Why a donation to a hospital when there are children in this world who cannot attend school?" Cruel, but someone will think it. On the other hand, if you give to UNICEF someone will grumble about the lack of efficiency, wasted funds on fancy buildings and glossy image-building, and endless red tape and paperwork in the organization. You cant please everyone -- even for a good cause!



Second, it may come across as showy and bragging. I know firsthand that those who announce donations or look for recognition often do NOT make good on their promises.



Third, favors are going out of style and your guests will not miss a candle one bit. In fact they will probably not even notice that there are no favors. So, you do not owe them a favor, nor do you owe them an explanation of where that "favor money" went to.



Fourth, if your guests want to donate to the animal shelter.... believe me, they will. You dont need to do it for them.



And fifth, your wedding is not the time or the place for charitable solicitation, advertising, or otherwise. Make that donation! Just dont make it be a part of your wedding. Its just not in good taste. Peace.

Answer 11

Speaking in terms of etiquette, it is not appropriate to give donations as gifts. While St. Jude's is a great charity, not all your guests may agree. Charities are a personal thing and I would not be pleased if someone donated in my name to a charity that I did not support.



I pretty much agree with what Fizzy Stuff wrote.



Edit: I don't think anyone feels your intention are not good, obviously they are but my answer remains from an etiquette point of view.

Answer 12

I think that is a beautiful and generous idea :)

My sister has kept every wedding favor for every wedding she's been to :)

Answer 13

My cousin did that for her wedding. I thought it was the nicest thing. I don't remember who she donated to, but I remember that they did it.

Answer 14

Kudos!

Answer 15

I think it's a great idea. I also think it will be much more appreciated than a truffle or a candle holder.

Answer 16

Love it!

Answer 17

sounds good, i love it...xxx