Should I get mad at my fiance or am I overreacting?

Question

This is how her guy "best" friend (who I have never met since he lives on the other coast) replied to her invitation to connect on LinkedIn. Let me point out there is a history of too much of a close relationship between the two for my taste which has been reason for arguments over and over as they refered to each others with pet names, i love you, numerous phone calls, etc...although she swears she has never been involved with him, even before we met.



i'd like to add YOU to my sexual network...ROAAAAR

On 10/16/08 1:09 PM, Jane Doe wrote:
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I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn.

- Jane

Answer 1

Sweetie

I am not defending her at all, but if you truly love her, then trust her. Unless someone presents you with unwavering proof, just trust her. I have friends that I tell every time I talk to them I love them. I think of them as family and have them in my heart as family. And there is no true family relation to any of them.



To help with your fears find a way of getting together with her friend and have a civilized conversation to get to know him.

Answer 2

As other people have pointed out, she didn't write it... but the comment the friend wrote is indeed inappropriate. I would be pretty pissed about it myself. Yes, you should trust your fiance not to do anything, but this comment would certainly warrant a frank talk with my SO if I were in your shoes. You need to tell her how uncomfortable those kind of things make you, and she should have a talk with the friend and tell him to tone things down.



Those are my two cents anyway.

Answer 3

Why would you get mad at your fiancee'? She didn't write it.

I have plenty of male friends, two among my best, and we joke around all the time, and my fiance' is confident enough not to read anything into it. The one time a male friend because inappropriate, I let him know. It's called trust and communication, and both are integral to any successful relationship.