Question:
20 guests - Should I bother with RSVP cards?
Treasa
2008-08-24 16:34:03 UTC
All my guests are friends and family who I am regularly in contact with, and there are only about 20 of them. Should I even bother with RSVP cards, since we aren't having a sit down dinner or anything catered, and we're extremely likely to talk on the phone several times before the wedding? Thanks!
Fourteen answers:
Debbie P
2008-08-24 17:03:43 UTC
Don't bother. I would just have your phone number included in your invitations and a response date. Worse comes to worse, you can call everyone if you haven't heard from them.
?
2016-05-24 14:02:38 UTC
You are talking only about the people who responded verbally, right? Well, they may have thrown away or misplaced the RSVP cards by now, so just make a note of it on your tally sheet. Now, talk to your parents and your fiance and your in-laws, at once, and tell each of them that they need to tell any future verbal responders to send the RSVP cards in the mail to be counted as a guest, or not. It really is kind of insensitive for guests to tell someone to tell you that they are or are not attending your wedding, especially since you have already provided a stamped, self addressed response card for everyone's convenience, but, mostly yours to keep track of your guest list. So, inform all your close people (parents and fiance) that they need to insist on the guests using their RSVPs.
aspasia
2008-08-24 16:50:05 UTC
No.



First, because for very formal weddings, RSVP cards are bad form. People who routinely engage in formal social correspondence have their own social stationery and prefer to use it, writing out longhand that "Miss Aspasia Phipps/accepts with pleasure the kind invitation of/Miss Jane Lastname...." An RSVP card suggests to such guests that they don't know how to respond properly, so it's offensive.



To people who don't routinely engage in social correspondence, RSVP cards force them to use a form of communication they aren't comfortable with. These are people who routinely use text, voicemail, telephone and email; and in many cases the pleasant walk down to the postal pillar to mail the card is more annoyance than pleasant walk.



Brides swear by RSVP cards because they make record-keeping easier. With only twenty guests you don't need extensive record-keeping, and even those who do can hardly be said to be being gracious by forcing their guests to conform to their rolodex format.



Stationery companies swear by RSVP cards because they get more of your hard-earned money by selling them to you. And remember, most web- and magazine-etiquette mavens are sponsored by such members of the "wedding industry".



But Miss Manners -- the figurative one, as well as the one trademarked by Judith Martin -- will be quite happy for you to leave them out.
yogiT
2008-08-24 19:51:54 UTC
i would - it's classy & sets the event up with the style it deserves so others don't view it as just another dinner party!

helps you confirm numbers in a more solid fashion than word of mouth too. RSVP's really make people commit.
iloveweddings
2008-08-24 17:17:13 UTC
No need to bother with RSVP cards and it is totally up to you if you even want to bother with invitations. But, if it was me, I would still want to send invitations. Make them yourself! OR...there is this company where you order as little as 10.

http://www.polkadotdesigns.com/
Believe
2008-08-24 16:38:20 UTC
I dont see a need for cards.. just put an RSVP date.
Sophiesmama
2008-08-24 17:31:27 UTC
I wouldn't-just list your phone number or email address to rsvp to
Asked and Answered
2008-08-24 18:20:05 UTC
I would save the money. Since you are in regular contact with them, i figure you'll talk to them about it anyway.



Congrats & best wishes.





PS the link that iloveweddings posted shoud be
gapeach0201
2008-08-24 16:48:06 UTC
nah, no need to waste time or money with RSVP cards for such a small number. most people don't use them even if you provide them anyways. good luck :-)
iloveorlandofl
2008-08-24 16:49:33 UTC
Don't bother with the cards, but be sure to include your phone number and the date by which you hope they will get back to you.
jandismommie
2008-08-24 16:48:15 UTC
Don't waste the money or your time filling them out. Just invite them over the phone.
anonymous
2008-08-24 16:49:44 UTC
I wouldn't since you talk to them on a regular basis..
bride-to-be
2008-08-24 16:38:42 UTC
i wouldn't.

if you're going to be in contact with them anyways, it would save you some money =)



congrats!
anonymous
2008-08-24 16:38:20 UTC
dont waste the money. by phone is great


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