Does the Save The Date have to match the Invitation?

Question

My fiance and I are getting married in October. I'm preparing to send out our Save The Dates, but does the wedding invitation have to be the same layout, stationery, etc? I'm doing them up myself on the computer and would like a different style invitation. Would that look weird?

Also, how long before the event do you send out wedding invitations, and how long do you allow people to RSVP?

Thanks.

Answer 1

The save-the-dates and the wedding invitations definitely DO NOT have to match. Most people go cheaper (homemade) with the save-the-dates.



Wedding invitations: mail them 8 weeks prior to the wedding date. The RSVP deadline date should be about 2 weeks (maybe 3) prior to the wedding. Most venues do not need a final head count until 1-2 weeks before the wedding. If you put the RSVP deadline too soon (say 4-6 weeks prior to the wedding), you will get lots that are not returned because people will say "I don't know my schedule yet." So, again, only allow 2-3 weeks before the wedding and use that as the RSVP deadline date.

Answer 2

I think it's more fun when they don't match because you can have a little more fun with the Save the Dates. Mine did not match as most people's don't. A new trend is sending Save the Date refrigerator magnets, those definitely wouldn't match the formal invitation. :)



Invitations are usually sent out 6-8 weeks in advance. This allows the guests 5-7 weeks to RSVP. Usually you have to give your venue a final count a week in advance so you can have your RSVP date either 1 or 2 weeks before the wedding date.

Answer 3

No, they don't have to match.



Wedding invites should go out 2-6 months before hand... if the majority of people will be traveling, the more advance notice, the better. Make the RSVP date 30 days before, though with some people you'll have to follow up. Your caterer will usually need a final head count 1-2 weeks before.

Answer 4

No, I actually think Save The Date Cards should be something fun and creative, Have fun with your favorite picture, or something that represents you and him, or creative background.



RSVP's, I am doing mine no later than a month prior because the caterer needs a head count 2 weeks prior to the wedding !



Hope this helps and good luck with our wedding in October

Answer 5

They dont have to match, though I personally prefer it when they do. Our wedding has all matching stationary but I'm already pretty anal about those kind of things.



Wedding invitations should go out about 8-10 weeks before the wedding or longer if it is a destination wedding or a popular date (holiday weekends primarily). I will be requesting our RSVP's about a month before our wedding. I think thats pretty much the standard.

Answer 6

Nope! Mine are going to be fun and quirky, but the invitations and what nots are going to be very formal. It's customary to send out wedding invitations 2 months before the wedding. Just to be on the safe side, send them out 1 week prior to the 2 month mark so you can ensure everyone receives theirs. How long you give them depends on your caterer and/or venue. They usually need a head count anywhere from 1 month to 2 weeks before the wedding. Good luck!

Answer 7

mine won't be matching.



We're making our Save the Date cards (I designed them and my Dad is printing them) but we're ordering the invitations; our invitation will be formal, but the Save the Date cards have been inspired by a web comic I do (Dad's idea)



As for the RSVP time; I'd say give them two to three months to RSVP, just remember you have to call those who didn't RSVP to make sure they are coming or not; just because they didn't RSVP doesn't mean they're not coming.

Answer 8

I'm so glad that you asked me instead of getting your guidance from magazines and websites that are primarily concerned about making the advertisers happy, not with telling brides the truth. You don't send 'save the dates' at all. If Jeremy and Jane are so dear to your father that he wants them at your wedding, then your father can take pen in hand (or grab his cell phone) and write a short personal letter (or send an email) to Jeremy and Jane. Ditto for the groom's mother informing her own family, and you informing your personal friends.



The key word here is personal, meaning uniquely created for the recipient, not some identical 'spam' going out to everyone. Communication via impersonal mass produced junk mail is for commercial enterprises like dental offices and pizza parlors. This shabby sort of communication is not at all good enough for special social events like your wedding.



Since the messages will be coming from several different people, it is those several different people who choose their stationery -- or choose to send a fax or smoke signals or whatever. If you want to use matching stationery for your own letters to your friends, that sounds charming.



You mailing dated depends when you need your exact head count so that you can finish your seating chart and inform the catering firm. Mail on that date minus 10 weeks. A week after the mailing, put your helpers to work contacting everyone who has not yet contacted you. Miss Manners tells us that when we receive an invitation, we should promptly acknowledge that invitation. If we are not sure whether we will attend, we ask "May I have until the end of the month to respond?" (Acknowledge means "I got the invitation." Respond means "I will [or will not] attend.) So it is not at all "pushy" for your helpers to phone people and kindly inquire whether the postal service has delivered the invitation.



This polite prompt to acknowledge the invitation is followed by an equally polite "May I tell the couple when to expect your response?" If people ask for a deadline, the answer is "As soon as possible. Will you know by next week?" Give people a weekly reminder here, not permission to dawdle until the day before the deadline.



You may have noted that RSVP cards are not a part of this RSVP process. Response cards are yet another invention of magazines and websites that are primarily concerned about making the advertisers happy, not with telling brides the truth. Put a phone number right on the invitation, just beneath the letters RSVP. As stated earlier, your helpers take and make most of the calls. Indeed, this used to be the cheif duty of bridesmaids and groomsmen, back before bridal magazines and websites decreed that their cheif duty is to be cash cows, buying scads of merchandise for numerous extra parties.



Make sure your helpers are prepared to fill in the details that are not included in your crisp elegant invitations.

How dressed up should I get?

What's for dinner?

Will there be booze?

and last but not least "What kind of gift would the couple most appreciate?"



Also make sure that your helpers are prepared to say things like "There is a misunderstanding. The invitation is for Mama Bear, Papa Bear, and Baby Bear only. Goldilocks is not on the guest list." and "The couple would like to be able to welcome everyone, but I'm afraid the wedding will be limited people that the family knows and cares about."



I hope this was helpful. Congrats and best wishes.

Answer 9

they don't could compare, no. It relies upon how lots of a perfectionist you're, and how formal the marriage is. We in simple terms matched the colour scheme, font and the image. something replaced into distinctly distinctive. i think of the factor Fortnum is lacking is that generally specific travelers could have a "heads up" for the marriage. we've 30% of our travelers flying in from out of the country, and if we've been to pass away the important factors till the invites have been despatched out, they could pay hefty fees on their air fares.

Answer 10

I don't think so. I had a couple of friends who were both just graduated from pharmacy school and sent out their save the dates as "prescriptions for love". And then the regular invite was very formal and nice. So, I think you could probably switch it up if you wanted.

Answer 11

Save the dates can be more creative and artsy than invitations. Have fun with them. ;-)

Answer 12

Mine didn't