getting married vs the wedding?

Question

are you supposed to get married and have your wedding the same day??
we wanna get married on may 15th, it's our anniversary when we started dating and we wanna keep our anniversary....

so, do we have to go get the legal documentation done AND have the wedding in the same day? that seems busy busy busy.

Answer 1

Getting the marriage license and getting married are not the same thing. And, no, you don't have to do both in the same day.



Generally, you go do your paperwork and get the marriage license a few days before the wedding. Then, you have your "wedding" where you exchange vows and sign the marriage license with your witnesses and your officiant.



According to your profile, you live in Delaware, where there is a 1-day waiting period before you can use the license, so you couldn't actually do it all in one day!! The license is valid for 30-days.

Answer 2

Here in the US you get your marriage license in advance in the county where you want to have the wedding performed. You will have to check for how long it is valid, where I'm at it's 60 days. Sometimes there is a waiting period for how long you have to wait between applying for the marriage license and the actual wedding date (obviously not in Vegas but where I live it isn't effective until the following day).



Then you have your actual wedding where the two of you are joined in matrimony by someone officiating. If you are set on having the wedding on May 15th so that you can hold on to your anniversary date of when you began dating, I would suggest that you first apply for the marriage license within the designated time period before May 15th. Consider going there on a Tuesday or Wednesday in the early afternoon so that you aren't in the middle of a rush with other couples trying to get things done by the weekend.



Then, if you don't want to have your actual reception where everybody shows up to have a meal and celebrate with you on May 15th, you could always have a judge marry you on the 15th at your local courthouse, and then have another ceremony or even just the reception itself on another date to accommodate all of the traffic concerns.



Good luck and congratulations!

Answer 3

I'm guessing you're not in the US, where the "legal documentation" part takes all of about 2.5 minutes to complete and authorize - you have to go pick up/pay for your license a few days in advance, but otherwise it's done, so it's generally done on the wedding day.



How long does it take to do the legal bit where you are? If you are having your wedding ceremony on your anniversary date, then try to schedule in the legal bit in the morning (for an afternoon/evening wedding) or later in the day for a morning wedding.



Otherwise, I don't see anything wrong with doing them on separate days.



EDITED: OK, I thought you were in one of those countries where your religious ceremony doesn't count legally - some places require you to have a civil ceremony before a judge in order to be legally married, plus one in a church to be married in the eyes of God. LOL, my bad.



Depending on where you live, you will go get your marriage license before the wedding day (on a business day, during business hours) and pay the fees, show your IDs, etc. Most states have a waiting period of at least a day but some don't, and most have a valid period of at least 30 days, so you can get it anytime during the validity period- you can find out here the requirements for your state here:



http://marriagelaws.info/



At your wedding, your officiant will do all the legal stuff (you sign the license, as do your witnesses if needed) and then you or your officiant will send the completed and signed license into the state for filing. Again, the license must be received back by the state before the validity deadline has passed.



If your officiant has done a lot of weddings, s/he will know exactly what needs to happen in the state you're marrying in. Good luck!

Answer 4

Wow with the attitudes....

My fiance and I are getting married at the courthouse on the 18th of June and our wedding isn't until October. It makes more sense for us to get married as soon as possible because he's in the Army and I wanted to keep our anniversary as well which is also the 15th,sadly that falls on a Sunday this month but our actual wedding is the 18th so it works out there...

Answer 5

You get a marriage license prior to your wedding. Some states require that you have it at least a few weeks before the wedding. Check with your county courthouse...that is where you usually get it. You need to have your license to get married. You, your spouse, witnesses (usually bestman & maid of honor) and the person performing the marriage ceremony sign the marriage certificate either the day before or day of the wedding. You then send that back to the office where you received your licence. Your wedding anniversary will be the day of your wedding. May 15th is my birthday so HAPPY ANNIVERSARY almost a month late. (side note: if you can't get your wedding on your anniversary date, it isn't that bad. My husband and I tried to do it but it didn't work out. Now we have 2 special days for us.)

Answer 6

We got our license about a week before the wedding at the county clerk's office. On the day of the wedding, we had the ceremony and then when it was over the minister signed the license, the maid of honor and best man signed as witnesses, and then the minister sent it off to the county to be recorded.



Hope this helps you...I guess it's probably different in every state but I don't think you usually get the license on the wedding day. Best of luck to you!!!!!

Answer 7

Many states have a waiting period, in NY you have to wait one full 24 day before the marriage license can be used......and some require blood tests so you have to wait for the dr's appointment & the certificate of test results..................

most licenses are valid for 60 days so why do it so rushed......

....and you getting married IS your wedding...the party AFTER the ceremony, usually the same day, is the reception.



You might not be able to...my husband and I tried, but the exact day fell on a friday and the judge was available for weddings Sat only (we had a town hall ceremony officated by the town judge) so we married exactly one year & one day after our meeting face to face anniversary...still is a sweet.

Answer 8

I know in the state of California you go down to the courthouse up to 90 days before the wedding and get your marriage license. After 90 days it expires.

Then, the day that you have a judge, pastor, minster or whoever you are having that has appropriate authority to marry you, is the day you get married.

Some people want to have anniversaries on a specific date. If the date falls on a day other than a Friday, Saturday or Sunday I've seen people go down to the courthouse and have the ceremony done on that day, but then celebrate by having the reception on a different day.

Answer 9

I don't follow you... A wedding is just a fancy way to commemorate signing the marriage license. So yeah, the ceremony is performed, the paperwork is signed, and then you have a reception (optional). It is normally done on the same day, although sometimes the ceremony and the reception can be done at different times, which is often the case with destination weddings.



P.S. Yes, you do have to get the marriage license in advance, it is usually valid for 90 days during which time you get married.

Answer 10

I'm confused. The wedding is how you get married. You have to get the license before, but the day that you are married is the day the officiant performs the ceremony. He or she will sign the license and then it will be recorded by your county.

Answer 11

my fiance and I are considering the same thing, we are from 2 diffrent backgrounds religolsly and seemed that this way we dont ahve to worry about having a preacher from one or the othere and hence a big fight. You can get marreid on paper and then a couple days latter have the cermony..good luck! and conga-rats!

Answer 12

when you have your wedding your getting married.

if you want to just get married and have a reception or gathering with friends and family, you can do that any time. you can get legal forms anytime filled out, that doesn't make you married til it's signed as such (not just validated)

Answer 13

I really don't understand keeping the "anniversary." I know plenty of brides who do this, it just doesn't make any sense to me. Your wedding day should trump any dating anniversary. Just my opinion.



As for the documentation, you get all that done a few days before.

Answer 14

The day you get married and the wedding day is the same thing! You have to get a license BEFORE your wedding day so it can be filled out by the person marrying you! Are you old enough to get married?